Thursday, September 29, 2005

Lost is a Terrible Show

Lost, the ABC show about that won last year's Best Drama Emmy, is seriously crappy. From the very beginning last year, no one on the show acted like a real person who had just survived a plane crash on a deserted island would act. They didn't build a shelter, or find a water source, or try to find food. They let one dickhead confiscate all the goodies from the plane and sell them to other castaways for exorbitant sums of useless money, and put all the water they could find in the wreck in one place and then didn't guard it. No one has a week's more facial hair than they did when they crashed more than a month ago, and the women still have makeup and hair people, apparently.

And that's just the logic issue. The dialogue is more stilted than anything Jean-Claude van Damme has ever done, and the characters are almost all dramatic bitches who still, after 40+ days on the island, act like 2-year-olds when they don't get what they want, which is usually to do something unbelievably stupid. The only likeable people there are the fat guy, the Iraqi, and the crazy knife-strapped dude who was paralyzed from the waist down until the crash and miraculously woke up with full motor control and the strength and stamina to run around saving people and hunting wild boars.

Last night was the second episode of the new season, and we're no closer to understanding why a weird British guy who the morose, overwrought jackass who's the island doctor met in a football stadium years ago has been living in a bomb shelter under the island for what appears to be years. They may drag this cliffhanger out for another three or four shows, but I'll never know, because I'm boycotting that crap.

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