A commenter on another site wrote that you can't hate the Patriots because they are everything that's good about football. I disagree strongly. Here's how you work up a hatred for the Patriots:
1. Their coach is homeless, or dresses as if he were, and may be a robot. Just once I'd like to see him sing, "Happy, and Peppy, and Bursting with Love" from the Odd Couple episode where Felix is extra gay. No, the other one.
2. Tom Brady is deeply uninteresting when the topic is not football. I wrote elsewhere that he exhibits savant behavior, which is entirely true. He has no opinions about anything but football. He's one-dimensional and will become for real what Belichick looks like now after his career is over: homeless. Not through losing his fortune, or becoming a drug addict, but because no one will be able to stand him when his career ends.
3. Bruschi, Johnson, Vrabel, and most of the rest of the defense have large, misshapen cartoon heads. In fact, they are misshapen all over. It's creepy. They probably smell weird too.
4. The Pats are not what's best about the NFL. They are a flat, featureless landscape of uninteresting boringness, an undifferentiated sack of yawn-inducing plainness, what Studio 54's Steve Rubell called "the grey people." The Steelers and Cowboys of the '70s had more interesting characters on those two teams than are in the entire league today, and the Patriots have the least interesting roster ever in the history of sports.
5. The Falcons and the Steelers would have been 25 times more interesting than the game we're going to get in Super Bowl 39. Hell, any matchup would have been more interesting than this. The Patsies are going to win big and McNabb and Owens are going to cry about how it would have been different if he TO hadn't been hurt. Yawn.
In conclusion, the Patriots are the new Yankees, and I hate them.
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2 comments:
But will you bet against them?
I won't, they are very good, so I am not betting against them until they loose.
fringy
I will not, and that's why they suck. There's no suspense to the game. I loved it when they beat the Rams in their first Super Bowl win because it was a surprise. Now they're the Evil Empire like the Rams were then. I guess I just don't like dynasties, unless they're the Dallas Cowboys. Go Cowboys!
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