Uncle Mikey's Gymnasium

Aunt Genie's Fun Festival

2008-10-11T13:46:00.001-07:00

My sister Genie, who is wonderful and an amazing aunt (just like the rest of my sisters, all six of whom Sabrina adores), took Sabrina to dinner and afterward to this fun place that Sabrina still hasn't gotten over. It's along the hike and bike trail that runs around the downtown section of Lady Bird Lake (formerly Town Lake), atop a small hill on the South side of the lake (which is really the Colorado River with dams on either end). There's a disco dance floor there and Sabrina just went nuts.

She sang and danced for a very long time and wore herself out to much that Mommy had to carry her back to the car the whole way. Sabrina even cried when another family tried to take pictures on the lights. How dare they.

Pretty Passenger

2008-10-11T13:39:00.001-07:00

Sabrina's not old enough to ride in the front seat yet, but she loves her new big-girl booster seat and won't ride in anything else. We like it too because it's got good head support wings on either side and when she falls asleep back there they hold her head very nicely.

I love her little fleece coat in this picture. It's not quite cold enough here to wear it, but we let our little angel set the dress code for herself, which explains all the princess wear.

Visiting Angel

2008-10-11T13:35:00.001-07:00

Sabrina entertains Aunt Naomi by dancing on her furniture. Naomi has invited us to her home the last two Thanksgivings and Sabrina has absolutely loved the experience both times, as have we. Naomi is a delightful host and a lovely person all around, as is her man Adam.

Unf*ckingbelievable

2008-10-04T19:09:00.000-07:00

Just beyond belief that this isn't enough to get him thrown in jail, much less disqualified from running for President, much less not even goddamn ASKED about it by the disgustingly biased mainstream media:

Mr. Good Will - who lists his employer as "Loving" and his profession as "You" - has contributed 1,000 times to the Barack Obama campaign. All the contributions have been in amounts of $25 or less. But they add up to $17,375 - far more than the legal limit of $4,600. That's $2,300 each for the primary and general election campaigns.

Wait. There's more:

Mr. Doodad Pro made 786 contributions for a total of $19,500. Like Mr. Good Will, Mr. Pro lists his employer as "Loving" and his profession as "You." Mr. Pro said he is from Nunda, N.Y. Directory assistance found no listing for him either. Mr. Obama has raised a whopping $223 million in contributions of less than $200. Candidates are not required to disclose the names of those who contribute less than $200, and Mr. Obama has not. John McCain has made his complete donor database available online.

Don't stop there, you'll miss the best part:

If there are more suspicious donors to the Obama campaign, we won't know until long after the election as long as their aggregate contributions are below the legal limit. Mr. Timmerman was particularly curious about 11,500 contributions from overseas totalling $33.8 million.

Emphasis mine. Just enough already. I'm tired of one side being held to a standard beyond reasonable and the other ignored, no matter what type of shady crap they do. I'd like to punch 90% of the journalists in this country in the face. I know it would take a long time and a lot of work, but I'm a giver. Link from Instapundit.

Sadly, No

2008-10-04T10:52:00.000-07:00

Thomas Sowell's new column is titled "Do Facts Matter?" I wish they did, but they sure don't seem to:

Fact Number One: It was liberal Democrats, led by Senator Christopher Dodd and Congressman Barney Frank, who for years-- including the present year-- denied that Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac were taking big risks that could lead to a financial crisis.
It was Senator Dodd, Congressman Frank and other liberal Democrats who for years refused requests from the Bush administration to set up an agency to regulate Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac.
It was liberal Democrats, again led by Dodd and Frank, who for years pushed for Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac to go even further in promoting subprime mortgage loans, which are at the heart of today's financial crisis.
Alan Greenspan warned them four years ago. So did the Chairman of the Council of Economic Advisers to the President. So did Bush's Secretary of the Treasury, five years ago.
Yet, today, what are we hearing? That it was the Bush administration "right-wing ideology" of "de-regulation" that set the stage for the financial crisis. Do facts matter?

Apparently not.

More Democratic Party Shenanigans

2008-10-03T15:28:00.000-07:00

Barney Frank's partner is a Fannie Mae executive.

Wow. Or as Ace says, "Why is it I f*cking know the exact time Sarah Palin had amniotic fluid leakage and I'm just finding this out now?"

%&$# You, You Disgusting Reptilian Whore

2008-09-29T11:54:00.000-07:00

The balls on this bitch. How dare she try to pin this Democratic party disaster that is the mortgage crisis on the Republicans who repeatedly tried to stop it. "How did it sneak up on us so silently"? You idiotic skank, you were told repeatedly it was coming. So was your entire turdpile of a party. And you kept right on anyway. Go straight to hell, harpy.

Unbelievable

2008-09-29T06:14:00.000-07:00

Watch this immediately. Maybe the best explanation of how the Democratic party screwed the country over with Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac available.

Sweet

2008-09-26T16:19:00.001-07:00

I was looking up "metal pez dispenser" after reading this (again from Thighmaster) and found this. Sweet.

Now That's More Like It

2008-09-26T15:55:00.000-07:00

This is what the internet is for. Thanks, Thighmaster, for one of the most consistently weird sites around for like years now.

Well, It's a Start

2008-09-25T11:35:00.000-07:00

I just hope it's not too late to get some of this stuff out. There's much more and better to be told about the Obamessiah, but we'll never see it in the mainstream media. Never.

Do the Right Thing

2008-09-24T20:28:00.000-07:00

And read this explanation of the current situation and the proposed bailout. Really good stuff and you need to know it. From Ace.

Frolic

2008-09-23T08:47:00.000-07:00

Sweet Sabrina in the wildflowers, May 2008. What a little angel. We were walking Fred a couple of days ago and she asked me to tell her a story. She gave a lot of instructions about who was to be in the story (Sully and Mike from Monsters, Inc., Nemo, Marlin, Dory and some other Finding Nemo characters, and Monster Bear from the Little Bear chronicles) and what the setting was to be (the beach), and after a few minutes of story she exasperatedly told me that SHE would be telling the story from now on, thank you very much. And she did. And it was fantastic.

That's never happened before and I like it. Her imagination is so active, we have to be careful about discussing injuries and illness because she'll tell us she has a broken arm or a cold if she's heard about one or the other that day. I'm worried we'll miss a real problem because we read a story about that problem just before it actually happened. Silly . . .

Wheee

2008-09-22T20:01:00.000-07:00

Yummy. I miss being young and stupid. It was so much fun.

Best Thing Ever

2008-09-18T18:06:00.000-07:00

I don't care if I've said other things were the best thing ever. Compared to this, they suck. I can't stop watching it.

I Can't Argue with This

2008-09-18T16:59:00.000-07:00

He is. He really is. Watch the whole video and you'll believe as I do.

Barack Obama, Idiot and Lying Sack of Sh*t

2008-09-17T19:21:00.000-07:00

I have had it with Obama's pathetic attempts to lie about recent history in hopes of getting elected to a position he has zero ability to deal with. Here's his most recent nonsense on parade, in which he tries to pin the collapse of Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac on Republicans:

Fannie and Freddie have been creations of the congressional democrats and the Clinton white house, designed to make mortgages available to more people, and as it turned out, some people who couldn’t afford them. Fannie and Freddie have also been places for big Washington democrats to go to work in the semi-private sector and pocket millions. The Clinton administration’s white house budget director Franklin Raines ran Fannie and collected 50 million dollars. Jamie Gurilli, Clinton Justice Apartment Official, worked for Fannie and took home 26 million dollars. Big Democrat Jim Johnson, recently on Obama’s VP search committee has hauled in millions from his Fannie Mae C.E.O. job.

Now remember, Obama’s ads and stump speeches attack McCain and republican policies for the current financial turmoil. It is demonstrably not Republican policy and worse, it appears the man attacking McCain, Senator Obama, was at the head of the line when the piggy’s lined up at the Fannie and Freddie trough for campaign bucks.

Emphasis mine. This is par for the course for Obama, who wouldn't have anything to say during campaign stops if he didn't lie his ass off. The press won't challenge him on it, so most people will never know. That sucks. Furthermore, if he's going to lie, he could at least learn the names of things:

“The fact that we have reached a point where the Federal Reserve felt it had to take this unprecedented step with the American Insurance Group is the final verdict on the failed economic philosophy of the last eight years . . ."

American International Group, you moron.

Update: More of the same. Why isn't any of this being reported in the mainstream media? It's the biggest story of the year, if you ask me, that the very financial disasters that are throwing the country, really the world, into a tailspin, are directly linked to the sleazy and dishonest behavior of the Democratic presidential nominee. Disgusting.

Update 2: Now he's lying about inventing the economic stimulus package. The balls on this guy.

See How That Works?

2008-09-16T13:25:00.001-07:00

I used to wonder how the world operated. Then I watched this video:

Mr. Show was the best sketch comedy show that ever was, and they're decent enough not to take their videos down from Youtube ever five seconds, which makes them even better.

That Just About Covers It

2008-09-02T19:54:00.000-07:00

Found this at One Cosmos, which is always a blast when you're feeling extra smart and thoughtful. The column in question is a beauty:

The Left always counts its presidential chickens before they're hatched. They did it with Algore, they did it with Kerry. They think they have victory in their grasp, and when reality says otherwise they feel robbed and betrayed. They have to find dark plots and conspiracies to explain the impossible; the Supreme Court was corrupt in stopping the Al Gore assault on the election rules in Florida. Ohio's voting machines were hacked to give George W. Bush his win there. Today, Algore is still bulking up with rage, eight years after Florida. Kerry still thinks he was "swiftboated" -- when his Swiftboat chain of command finally got its chance to tell the truth. Rapper P. Diddy was on YouTube yesterday going "Alaska? Alaska?" and "McCain, you're getting the *** out of town."

It's the gangster theory of electoral democracy. They're all counting on victory. It's theirs already. Like the Obama campaign keeps telling us, the election is just a formality. We have a new president, and his name starts with an O.

The Left is entitled to power, because in their own eyes they have Truth and Morality on their side. They are Mahatma Gandhi, they are Dr. King, they are the vanguard of the marching proletariat. It's not just Big O who has the incomprehensible egomania. His inner circle and vast numbers of his supporters do, too. Entitlement, grandiosity, narcissism: In psychiatric thinking they all suffer from secret feelings of inferiority, narcissistic wounds to their self-esteem. Every time they lose, those nagging feelings come up again. So they are always overcompensating, trying to bully reality into the shape they need.

Couldn't have said it better myself. Check out Bob's piece on this piece for more red meat.

Had to Happen Eventually

2008-09-02T19:11:00.000-07:00

And now it has. Good Lord. I'd ask if these people had any decency, but as they themselves are telling us, the answer is no.

Obamania

2008-08-30T23:43:00.000-07:00

Lots of political stuff going on recently: Obama's big speech and the shameless media handjob that followed it; McCain naming Palin as his running mate and the nauseating shower of hatefulness from liberal bloggers and TV personalities thereafter. Here are two of my favorite blog posts in the wake of all that.

First, a column about Obama's relationship with Bill Ayers by one of the people Ayers tried to kill when he was bombing things; then an interesting side-by-side comparison of Obama and Palin.

Both links from Ace, who you should read every day.

The First of Many

2008-08-24T23:01:00.001-07:00

Joe Biden is a real turd of a VP candidate, and I couldn't be more happy about it. All the video of Obama and him ripping each other over the Democratic nomination will be great fun, but this, and all of the other fun stuff we'll be seeing soon about him, is even better.

Somebody Pissed off God, Apparently

2008-08-24T21:45:00.000-07:00

Why else would she get struck by lightning as she filmed a storm? Link from Pajiba.

What. The. Hell.

2008-08-19T07:28:00.000-07:00

I don't even know how to describe this. Some links on the page are not work safe, probably, but the page itself is inoffensive. The video is extremely weird but interesting.

It Doesn't Get Much Sadder

2008-08-18T20:19:00.000-07:00

I consider Theodore Dalrymple one of the best writers and thinkers in the world today, and this column of his is shocking, chilling, and dead right in a number of ways. As in most of his work, he manages to opine on moral decay in a non-preachy, even non-judgmental way. Read it and weep, it's nasty medicine but damn good for you.

Link from Instapundit.

I Think I'm in Love

2008-08-18T19:50:00.000-07:00

Wow are these just beyond sexy. Especially number 5, I'd get medieval on that bizzlebazzle. Totally work safe.

Sweet Zoo Train Girl

2008-08-17T16:24:00.000-07:00

I try not to call Sabrina a baby any more, because she's not. Anyone who can use the adult-sized lavatory by herself is a young lady. If in the future this is an embarrassing revelation that mortifies my sweet, wonderful daughter, sorry about that. And there's a lot more where that came from.

Intense Girl

2008-08-17T16:22:00.000-07:00

Sabrina has many faces. This one wants ice cream.

Cool

2008-08-15T19:13:00.000-07:00

Really.

Bathing Beauty

2008-08-02T10:30:00.000-07:00

Darling Sabrina loves the pool at our new place. I haven't lived in an apartment for almost a decade, and I wasn't sure how it would be with a small child, but the place we ended up really works very nicely for us. No shady/loud/weird people around us, a great pool for Sabrina (and Deirdre and me, we swim every day and are really enjoying it, and the two hot tubs should come in handy as soon as it's not too hot to use them), and we don't have to maintain the yard in near-drought conditions, which is a relief.

Even Fred seems to like it better than the last place, although he had a large fenced yard there. That probably has something to do with the fact that we actually take him for walks here instead of just putting him out back in the yard like we used to, not to mention the presence of rabbits, deer and God knows what else around the grounds. We came across an enormous buck last night right before bedtime, and Fred took off after it as I got ready to run the other way. That thing was huge and it made a scary noise right before I saw it, and I've been reading a horror book called Terror about a giant demonic Polar bear that eats a bunch of Antarctic explorers in the 1800s. I was ready to sprint up the stairs and leave Fred to be eaten if need be. Sorry, Fred.

Well I Never

2008-07-30T06:58:00.000-07:00

Jon Voight: anti-Obama column writer. Man, I never in a million years expected to read something like this from him:

Sen. Barack Obama has grown up with the teaching of very angry, militant white and black people: the Rev. Jeremiah Wright, Louis Farrakhan, William Ayers and Rev. Michael Pfleger. We cannot say we are not affected by teachers who are militant and angry. We know too well that we become like them, and Mr. Obama will run this country in their mindset.

The Democratic Party, in its quest for power, has managed a propaganda campaign with subliminal messages, creating a God-like figure in a man who falls short in every way. It seems to me that if Mr. Obama wins the presidential election, then Messrs. Farrakhan, Wright, Ayers and Pfleger will gain power for their need to demoralize this country and help create a socialist America.

The Democrats have targeted young people, knowing how easy it is to bring forth whatever is needed to program their minds. I know this process well. I was caught up in the hysteria during the Vietnam era, which was brought about through Marxist propaganda underlying the so-called peace movement. The radicals of that era were successful in giving the communists power to bring forth the killing fields and slaughter 2.5 million people in Cambodia and South Vietnam. Did they stop the war, or did they bring the war to those innocent people? In the end, they turned their backs on all the horror and suffering they helped create and walked away.

I agree, I just never thought I'd hear it from this guy. Go figure. Link from Ace.

The Horror

2008-07-28T13:42:00.000-07:00

If you've eaten recently, you may not want to expose your central nervous system to this, or this. I tried to warn you.

Delightfully Violent

2008-07-27T04:48:00.000-07:00

Cool video below:

From here, which I found because I was looking for Clancy T. Bachleratt and Jackie Snad's album, featured in this video:

Spaceships, Toddlers, Model T. Cars & Jars of Beer

While You Enjoy Your Air Conditioned Home

2008-07-20T17:15:00.000-07:00

I hadn't heard much about the big fight in Afghanistan that killed nine US Airborne warriors, but here's the Stars and Stripes story about it. Amazing story:

When the attack began, Stafford grabbed his M-240 machine gun off a north-facing sandbag wall and moved it to an east-facing sandbag wall. Moments later, RPGs struck the north-facing wall, knocking Stafford out of the fighting position and wounding another soldier.

Stafford thought he was on fire so he rolled around, regaining his senses. Nearby, Cpl. Gunnar Zwilling, who later died in the fight, had a stunned look on his face.

Immediately, a grenade exploded by Stafford, blowing him down to a lower terrace at the observation post and knocking his helmet off. Stafford put his helmet back on and noticed how badly he was bleeding.

Cpl. Matthew Phillips was close by, so Stafford called to him for help. Phillips was preparing to throw a grenade and shot a look at Stafford that said, "Give me a second. I gotta go kill these guys first."

Why do I have to go all the way to Stars and Stripes to get this stuff? The only thing I had heard before this was the US body count, and how it meant we were losing the war again. This next part will be laughed about by the participant one day:

The insurgents then started chucking rocks at Gobble and Stafford’s fighting position, hoping that the soldiers might think the rocks were grenades, causing them to jump from the safety of their fighting hole. One rock hit a tree behind Stafford and landed directly between his legs. He braced himself for an explosion. He then realized it was a rock.

I would feel no shame in peeing my pants during that experience. Must be invigorating to not be blown to smithereens when you fully expect to do so.

Link from Ace.

Sweet Thing

2008-07-17T20:07:00.000-07:00

Sabrina walks up to me while I'm laying on the couch after dinner, slaps my belly and says "You're fat, Daddy. Daddy, you're fat. You're fat, Dad." And so on. I know it will only encourage her to insult strangers, but that cracks me up like a Dennis Miller special on HBO. I can listen to it all day long. I'd like to apologize in advance to the next portly person we come across at the park or the pool.

You Decide

2008-07-16T19:51:00.000-07:00

What's wackier: this story, or this video:

Came across the latter when I decided to see what would constitute one of the "gayest videos ever" on the Logo Channel. They weren't kidding. Frankly, I find it refreshing to hear the word "faggoty" in a song without it being a hateful rap reference. Not that I've actually heard it in that context, but I would have bet a considerable amount of money that it would sooner have come up there than here, where it's not just unashamed but exuberant. You go, um, girl.

Sure, it's almost superhumanly gay, but watch the whole thing. It's pretty catchy and inordinately hilarious.

More Ammunition

2008-07-10T23:38:00.000-07:00

Another body blow to the anthropogenic global warming crowd over at Ace's. When you take your feelings out of the equation, the alarmist arguments don't hold up worth a damn.

First Lady of Angrytown

2008-07-04T12:43:00.000-07:00

I don't know much about Barack Obama, and less about his wife. But this pretty well condenses what I have heard:

Consider the case of Michelle Obama. She was raised in a two-parent, middle-class family. She applied to one of America's top universities, Princeton, and was admitted. Of this experience, Michelle says on the stump, "All my life I have confronted people who had a certain expectation of me. Every step of the way, there has been people telling me what I couldn't do. When I applied to Princeton, they said: you can't go there, your test scores aren't high enough."
Which is all very moving, except that her test scores weren't high enough. Michelle Obama is part of the affirmative action generation of above-average but far-from-stellar performers who were granted preferential admission to America's most elite institutions.
Michelle notes that she graduated with honors in her major. Again, the problem is that her undergraduate thesis is on the web. You might expect that she wrote about Shakespeare's sonnets or the political evolution of W.E.B. Du Bois. Well, no. Essentially Michelle Obama wrote about the problems of being a black woman at an Ivy League university.
Here is a typical passage: "By actually working with the Black lower class or within their communities as a result of their ideologies, a separationist may better understand the desparation of their situation and feel more hopeless about a resolution as opposed to an integrationist who is ignorant to their plight."
Alas, the grammar is all wrong here. More than once, the tenses are garbled. People are ignorant "of" the plight of the lower class, not ignorant "to" their plight. And"desparation" should be spelled "desperation." To wreak so much havoc on the English language in one sentence, without conveying anything of substance, is perhaps deserving of a prize. Is this what her professors were thinking when they granted her honors?

I think Laura Bush may well be right when she defends Mrs. Obama's statement that she's only recently proud of her country (Mrs. Bush says she misspoke, and meant "more proud"), but the tone of her speeches is a bitter one. I don't understand that, considering her own fairly privileged life. D'Souza's best paragraph is this one:

One might expect that the reaction of someone who gets so many privileges to be grateful to a society that makes them possible. But no. Michelle Obama thinks that her very success is an example of white oppression. By a bizarre twist of logic, she converts "you're not good enough, but we'll take you anyway" into a message of "they said I wasn't good enough, but I proved them wrong."

Maybe it's a case of identifying with her husband's base, I don't know. I just know it comes across pretty nasty and ungrateful considering how well she's made out.

Sweet Little Monkey

2008-07-03T18:52:00.001-07:00

My wonderful sister Genie took this one, seems likely to be at a park somewhere but I don't know which one. What a darling she is for taking it and emailing it over. Sabrina is just too photogenic for words, and I worship her.

Sweet Child O' Mine

2008-07-01T21:16:00.000-07:00

I've been pretty mangled lately, my neck's been in a state of unpleasantness that is extraordinary even for me (I'm pretty used to being screwed up spinally and enduring it without much complaint, but this last month has been extra nasty), and my daughter has been very sweet about it. Today I was holding her hands as she bounced on an exercise ball, not supporting her weight but steadying her so she wouldn't fall, and she suddenly dropped to bounce on her bottom. I wasn't expecting it, and the sudden drop just killed my neck, upper back and head with a lightning bolt of death. I squealed "OW OW Ow ow ow ow ow" and dropped her as soon as she could safely land on her feet, and then I kind of went fetal and moaned for a while.

Sabrina immediately started patting my neck and upper back gently, and said "It's OK, Daddy, you're OK," very softly over and over again. She stayed with me for a long time, leaving for a minute to tell Mommy about Daddy's booboo, and then she came back to take care of me some more. I don't think I've ever been comforted by a child before, and certainly not my own child, so through the miserable pain I could only think of how proud I was of her, and how grateful I was to have her there. I don't know where she learned that, but I'm again struck by what an amazing little girl she's turning out to be.

Work It, Girl. And Boy, for That Matter

2008-06-28T12:58:00.000-07:00

If I had been smarter, I would have found a way to be an EU Parliamentarian instead of working for a living. They really know how to get paid for doing nothing at all. Meanwhile, I'm in the office sweating from showing property outside in late June in Austin, with stabbing pain in my neck, upper back and face that won't go away no matter what I do. Silly me . . .

Wow

2008-06-23T20:04:00.000-07:00

Amazing. Dirty naughty objectionable site, but an amazing play in a minor league baseball game. By the ball girl. Seriously, check it out.

Not that It Will Make a Difference

2008-06-20T11:49:00.000-07:00

In the way people perceive Bush, that is. You can debunk the fantasy that the administration lied about Iraq to lead us to war all you want (I've been doing so since before the war started), but people will still believe what they want to believe.

Why Am I Not Surprised

2008-06-20T11:33:00.000-07:00

What? Chris Matthews and Keith Olbermann are drooling over the late (and great, if you ask me) Tim Russert's Meet the Press gig? I'm shocked.

Happy Fun Movie

2008-06-18T10:28:00.000-07:00

Boner alert indeed. I watched Ong Bak and loved it, love Tony Jaa's fighting style and while I couldn't tell you a thing about the plot or even if there was any dialogue at all, it was an amazing film if only for this scene. Now that's what I call a long tracking shot - seven minutes of solid bad guy beatings.

Good Stuff

2008-06-13T15:29:00.000-07:00

This is inordinately dirty/profane/gross/icky and otherwise objectionable. I absolutely love it.

I tried to warn you, and you still looked. Don't blame me for your prurient interest. But wasn't it fantastic?

Oh for Christ's Sake

2008-06-10T21:16:00.000-07:00

Can we believe in any sport any more? Steroids/HGH/whatever in everything, boxing's been a fixed, faked pile of BS for more than a decade, the Olympics are a bad and boring joke, horse racing is just creepy (the damn horses' legs aren't even fully formed until they're 4 years old, which is the moral equivalent of infants having head-butting contests), the Patriots cheated their way to a number of Super Bowls, and now this?

NBA basketball has bored me since the 1990s, and even then Jordan got away with all kinds of illegal crap and never got called on it. But refs deciding games is beyond the pale. The only thing I buy any more is MMA/UFC fighting. The bouts are rarely decided by the judges, and I've yet to see a sketchy decision. Maybe that's why gladiators were so popular in Rome: it's hard to throw a fight when it means you die.

Mahmoud, You Sexy Bitch

2008-06-10T09:05:00.000-07:00

I actually like this song, not to mention finding it funny. Thank God for Samberg and his friends, they're often the only funny thing about SNL these days. Sorry about the ad at the beginning, it's short but I can't find another source for it but the NBC site.

In case this doesn't work, hit this link.

Deeply Unsurprising

2008-05-31T14:34:00.000-07:00

Of course war coverage is down 92% since the surge started working. They're using the economy to whack Bush with now, and Scott McLellan.

Memorial Day Madness

2008-05-31T11:31:00.000-07:00

What fun we had, and what a little angel the sometimes aggressive Will (or is it Bill nowadays?) was almost the whole time. I hope they can be friends, these two cousins, and when they're left alone they almost always get along. Then the parents show up and they fight. Why is that?

This Will Never Happen

2008-05-30T11:55:00.000-07:00

Al Gore will never debate anyone about global warming, much less the president of Czechoslovakia. And that's a real shame.

Link from Skinny Bean aka Timmler.

Yuck

2008-05-03T20:29:00.000-07:00

I can't remember when I've been so repelled by a human being:

On Sept. 11, Wurtzel, who usually gets up at the crack of noon, was asleep when her mother called to say a plane had just crashed into the World Trade Center. “My main thought was: What a pain in the ass.”

Her apartment was at ground zero, on Greenwich Street, south of Chambers. She could see the twin towers from her window. Or she could have, if she had bothered to get out of bed.

Then the second plane hit, and more people called. Wurtzel finally hauled herself up in time to watch one tower collapse. “I had not the slightest emotional reaction,” she recalls. “I thought: ‘This is a really strange art project.’ ”

Wurtzel takes a tiny bite of monkfish and ponders the worst terrorist attack in New York’s history. “It was a most amazing sight in terms of sheer elegance. It fell like water. It just slid, like a turtleneck going over someone’s head.”

She takes another bite of monkfish. “It was just beautiful. You can’t tell people this. I’m talking to you because you’re Canadian.”

Then her windows blew in. Airplane chunks landed on her roof. Wurtzel crawled into the basement and was later removed from the building. To this day, she can’t understand why everyone else was so upset. “I just felt, like, everyone was overreacting. People were going on about it. That part really annoyed me.”
Wurtzel became hysterical only when she realized she wouldn’t be allowed back to fetch her cat.

Disgusting. I apparently missed this when it happened, she's noteworthy today for her lame and lamebrained attempt to defend Obama's friendship with Weather Underground dickwads Bill Ayers and Bernardine Dohrn. Die in a fire, lady.

I Should Be Ashamed of Myself

2008-05-02T20:53:00.000-07:00

But I'm not.

Breathtaking

2008-04-30T16:56:00.000-07:00

I don't think I've ever seen anything so beautiful in my entire life. Picture by one of the other Mommies in Sabrina's Mommy's Day Out group.

I Want One

2008-04-30T16:54:00.000-07:00

Geekologie posted this Youtube video today, and I'm stealing it from them:

I'd pay $30 for that.

Well Said

2008-04-29T05:45:00.000-07:00

I don't understand the universal pessimism I get from young people these days, and I talk to a lot of them, being a UT campus-area realtor. It is an election year, and since Iraq's going well enough to not bash constantly, the economy's going to be the main bad news vehicle for journalists and other Democrats, but it's gotten a little ridiculous. This WSJ column says it better than I can:

So why the long faces? Sen. Obama reminds them every day of how dreary things are. Here's what Mr. "Audacity of Hope" told workers in Ohio last week: "Everywhere I go . . . you see people who have worked in a plant for 20 years, put their heart and soul into building profits for shareholders. Suddenly, the rug's pulled out from under them; the job's shipped overseas." Not only that, he explains: "They don't have health care. They don't have a pension. They're trying to compete with their teenage kids for a job paying $7 an hour at the local fast food joint."

Times are tough in many old industrial areas of the country. And middle-class anxiety about the costs of health care and higher education is real. But new data from the Census Bureau reveal that Americans of all income groups have made enormous gains in their standard of living in recent decades. As late as 1970, air conditioning, color TVs, washing machines, dryers and microwaves were considered luxuries. Today the vast majority of even poor families have these things in their homes. Almost one in three "poor" families has not one but at least two cars.

Consumption in real per-capita terms has nearly doubled since 1970. The single largest increase in expenditures for low-income households over the past 20 years was for audio and visual entertainment systems -- up 119%. In 2007 Americans spent an estimated $1 billion to change the tune of the ringer on their cellphones. Eating in restaurants used to be something the rich did regularly and the middle class did on special occasions. The average family now spends $2,700 a year dining out.

Mr. "Audacity of Hope" indeed. Hey, what else can he do? He's never done anything, run anything, or made right anything that was wrong. He has to piss all over the economy to distinguish himself and make the Republicans seem incompetent by comparison. But I'll guarantee one thing: no matter who wins in November, the economy will miraculously recover, or at least we'll stop hearing doom and gloom stories all the time. Journalists will find something else to mope about, and we can all get on with our lives.

Thomas Sowell said it best: very few people understand economics, and none of them work in the news industry. You used to have to be an expert in a certain field before they'd let you write about it, but now you have to be an expert in news writing before they'll give you a chance to learn about the field you're supposed to report on. That's all kinds of backward and stupid. Don't believe the hype about anything, and especially not the US economy.

Link from Paul Katcher.

Hell to the No

2008-04-26T15:13:00.000-07:00

What the hell is this crime against humanity? DO NOT WANT

Oh, Bawma

2008-04-12T06:59:00.000-07:00

I didn't have a crush on Obama before, and I certainly don't now. He seems like a decent fellow, but shares the same ugly quality that so many people (I was going to say liberals, but I'm not sure that's entirely fair) do: a basic distaste for the average American, and maybe even for the average person. It's alarmingly fashionable to say "I hate people" while smiling or laughing, and actually mean it. It's a mark of cleverness, of sophistication. As someone once said, there are far too many good reasons to hate individuals to find reasons to lump them together in your disgust.

The Departed

2008-04-11T22:13:00.001-07:00

We lost Oliver a couple of days ago. He was born with an undersized liver and it probably never really worked right, which caused a number of other problems, most notably bladder stones and later neurological problems. Seizures, toward the end. We feel as miserable as you might imagine for not adding up the clues, and there were many in the last few months, but even worse, there were more subtle ones for years.

I can't tell you how painful it is to realize that he suffered because of our affection for him. A small and malfunctioning liver doesn't process protein very well, and we stuffed the poor little fellow with doggie chicken jerky, meat from the dinner table, and even his fancy veterinary-quality food was probably poisoning him slowly. But we just didn't understand the signs, and neither did our veterinarian.

Even worse is the fact that toward the end he wasn't able to go the whole night without relieving himself once or twice, and in our most recent home we don't have a doggie door. Usually I'd get up a couple of times, a sort of mental alarm clock, and take him out, but when I didn't I'd patrol the kitchen first thing and usually find a couple of messes. He had the good nature to do it on the tile, but I have to confess to punishing him more than once, figuring it had to be malicious. Mind you, he'd leave similar gifts on the floor even if we just left him and Fred in the house for a half hour no matter how many times we let him out before, so it's not like he didn't have some doggie vengeance in his soul (the first time we moved after getting him, we left the dogs alone in the house for two hours and he took a dump on my pillow), but I'll never forgive myself for yelling at him, making him smell it and spanking him one morning recently when I'd had it with cleaning up the floor several days in a row. I feel like a monster. He couldn't help himself and probably felt like crap for months, maybe years, and instead of trying to understand why I just lost it and took it out on a sick dog who couldn't help himself.

Oliver was a sweet, exuberant little puffball of love, a one of a kind dog who I'll remember forever, just like I'll always remember Patton, the orange tabby who's grooming him in the picture above. Pattycake disappeared one day outside our condo in Travis Heights, and we don't know if he was bitten by a rattler, hit by a car, eaten by the grey foxes that lived in the empty lot next door, or kidnapped by the neighbors who moved away the day he disappeared. But losing both of these wonderful animals taught me one simple thing: when your sister the veterinarian gives you advice, take it. My sister Nancy told me a thousand times not to give my dogs human food or too many treats, and she told me just as many times not to let my cat outside the house. She was right on both counts, and I was a fool to think I knew better, that I was being kind to them by giving them what I thought they wanted, what I thought I'd want in their places. I just sped them on their way. I hope they can forgive me.

I'll miss you, Ollie Bear. See you on the other side.

UPDATE: See Deirdre's touching tribute here.

So a Guy Walks into an Agent's Office

2008-04-08T08:36:00.000-07:00

I'm a sucker for magic, and particularly card tricks. I don't even want to know how they're done, because it would ruin them for me. I've got a friend who can't enjoy movies because he's always imagining the cameras, crew and set during every scene. That must suck, and I want no part of it.

I also enjoy profanity and lewdness. This video is from a documentary called The Aristocrats, which if you haven't seen you should, as long as you don't mind unbelievably foul language and imagery. You've been warned, so don't watch this part of it if you're liable to object to naughtiness:

You've got to see Bob Saget's version of the joke, not to mention Jason Alexander's, which features butterflied testicles. You heard me.

Sassy Fun Baby

2008-03-27T15:26:00.001-07:00

Sabrina is the most delightful, giggly little girl, and I know that because when you tickle her, she bursts into the most amazing laugh, and when you stop she says "More." And then you blow a raspberry on her tummy and she laughs even longer and louder than before. Then you pick her up and hug her with a big grin on your face and the one of the warmest, happiest feelings you've ever known in your heart.

She won't put up with that for long, because that's not the game she's there to play. But she tolerates it for a while because she knows you can't help yourself, and after a few seconds it's back to work. You wipe the moisture from the corners of your eyes and get back on the job, and it starts all over again, and again, until you're exhausted and Mommy takes over for a while. It's hard to let go, but it all begins and ends with Mommy, and if you had to hand her over to anyone, it would be her. You're just grateful to be a part of it all.

Sabrina's Art, part 2

2008-03-27T15:21:00.001-07:00

Sabrina chose the last one as her favorite of the five I had pictures of (my absolute favorites are some of her first paintings ever, and they're at the office just above where my laptop goes - I'll definitely take pics of those soon and post them), but I like this one a lot. She's so sure of what she wants to do, and she doesn't hesitate or think about it, it just comes out of her onto the paper. One day I hope to be as much of an artist as she already is.

Sabrina's Art

2008-03-27T15:18:00.000-07:00

Take that, Monet! More to come . . .

Sabrina's Bed

2008-03-27T14:56:00.001-07:00

This is the top bunk in Sabrina's new bed (thanks Grandmama AKA my mother!), which she climbs up and down with confidence. We've put pillows around the likely tumble-down areas, but no flying leaps yet, thank God. Below is the sleeping area, up top is for play and stuffed animal storage.

She loves to show off her bed to visitors, and they're all required to climb the ladder and get up under the canopy, which is covered with stars. It's very strong, but I'm usually worried about getting up there as it creaks a little.

We haven't yet succeeded in getting her to spend the night here on her own, and considering the degree to which she flails around in our bed, I'm a little worried she'll knock herself cold on one of the uprights, but we all have to learn such things the hard way. Mommy's quite good at bubble-wrapping sharp corners in a stylish and effective way, so I look forward to sleeping on a portion of our bed that's wider than 18 inches someday soon. Yay me! Considering I used to sleep from corner to corner of my king-sized bed and never touched the side for five years, that will be just unbelievably fantastic. The dogs are probably hoping to get back up there too, but no dice, piggies. You're still banished to your luxurious piles of pillows.

Worth Watching

2008-03-27T14:20:00.000-07:00

Fitna, the film about Islam by Geert Wilders. Interesting but seriously graphic and difficult to watch at times. But probably good for you, so do it anyway. Link hijacked from Ace of Spades.

Nice Skirt, Mike

2008-03-27T14:14:00.001-07:00

Hey, who knows when I'll be wearing a kilt again? I don't know if you can tell, but the tie kind of matches. Boo-ya, suckas.

Man That's Good Stuff

2008-03-12T14:17:00.000-07:00

I'm a fan of David Mamet, who wrote the play that was made into one of my favorite movies, Glengarry Glen Ross. He may well have written the screenplay, but I'm too lazy to look that up. Mamet has apparently long been, in his words, a "brain-deal liberal," which considering his writing is bit of a surprise. He always seemed to have a conservative worldview, as liberals often do when you get down to it.

Anywho, he's written an interesting column for the Village Voice:

I took the liberal view for many decades, but I believe I have changed my mind.

As a child of the '60s, I accepted as an article of faith that government is corrupt, that business is exploitative, and that people are generally good at heart.
These cherished precepts had, over the years, become ingrained as increasingly impracticable prejudices. Why do I say impracticable? Because although I still held these beliefs, I no longer applied them in my life. How do I know? My wife informed me.

It's a long column, but well worth the time. Mamet, a New Yorker (I think) in the entertainment industry, will catch a rash of sh*t for writing this, as the comments will reveal if you care to read them. He's probably not going to suffer financially, being one of the rich white males liberals love to hate already, but I foresee a lot of awkward encounters at award ceremonies, movie premieres, etc. He gets a little closer to the point here:

And I began to question my hatred for "the Corporations"—the hatred of which, I found, was but the flip side of my hunger for those goods and services they provide and without which we could not live.

And I began to question my distrust of the "Bad, Bad Military" of my youth, which, I saw, was then and is now made up of those men and women who actually risk their lives to protect the rest of us from a very hostile world. Is the military always right? No. Neither is government, nor are the corporations—they are just different signposts for the particular amalgamation of our country into separate working groups, if you will. Are these groups infallible, free from the possibility of mismanagement, corruption, or crime? No, and neither are you or I. So, taking the tragic view, the question was not "Is everything perfect?" but "How could it be better, at what cost, and according to whose definition?" Put into which form, things appeared to me to be unfolding pretty well.

My major problem with liberalism is the idea that perfection is attainable, but that evil conservatives are keeping it from us. I'm oversimplifying, but conservatism seems to me to take human nature into account more fully than liberalism. I found this section particularly interesting:

What about the role of government? Well, in the abstract, coming from my time and background, I thought it was a rather good thing, but tallying up the ledger in those things which affect me and in those things I observe, I am hard-pressed to see an instance where the intervention of the government led to much beyond sorrow.
But if the government is not to intervene, how will we, mere human beings, work it all out?

I wondered and read, and it occurred to me that I knew the answer, and here it is: We just seem to. How do I know? From experience. I referred to my own—take away the director from the staged play and what do you get? Usually a diminution of strife, a shorter rehearsal period, and a better production.

The director, generally, does not cause strife, but his or her presence impels the actors to direct (and manufacture) claims designed to appeal to Authority—that is, to set aside the original goal (staging a play for the audience) and indulge in politics, the purpose of which may be to gain status and influence outside the ostensible goal of the endeavor.

I've excerpted more than is probably helpful, or even legal for all I know, but it's all well worth reading. Check it out.

One Sensible Voice in a Hurricane of Nonsense

2008-03-11T12:22:00.000-07:00

Tim Blair, ever the Global Warming skeptic (good for him - we all should be, considering what people like Al Gore stand to gain from widespread acceptance of his nonsense), has found a story that, along with others and a common-sense view of the current state of climate science, helps non-brainwashed people make sense of the issue:

Miklós Zágoni isn't just a physicist and environmental researcher. He is also a global warming activist and Hungary's most outspoken supporter of the Kyoto Protocol. Or was.
That was until he learned the details of a new theory of the greenhouse effect, one that not only gave far more accurate climate predictions here on Earth, but Mars too. The theory was developed by another Hungarian scientist, Ferenc Miskolczi, an atmospheric physicist with 30 years of experience and a former researcher with NASA's Langley Research Center.

After studying it, Zágoni stopped calling global warming a crisis, and has instead focused on presenting the new theory to other climatologists.

Best American Idol-Related Thing Ever

2008-02-29T12:54:00.000-08:00

I don't know how people find the time to do something like this, but thank God for them and their wide-open schedules.

My Favorite Things

2008-02-28T15:50:00.001-08:00

I've often mentioned how magical Achewood is here on this tired old dog of a blog, because it just is. But sometimes it's so perfect that all I can do is tell you to go forth and check it out.

Thoughtful Baby

2008-02-28T06:46:00.001-08:00

Beautiful Sabrina is just too precious here, isn't she?

Bath Baby

2008-02-24T12:50:00.001-08:00

This one's from December of 2007, featuring the lovely Sabrina and many of her bath letters as clothing. Sort of a Goldie Hawn Laugh-In thing, I suppose. But more adorable and sweet.

Swing Baby

2008-02-24T10:06:00.000-08:00

Man I'm terrible at updating this blog lately. Between being horribly ill with the flu and losing 20 pounds during it, and taking another 10 days to not feel like fried death, and working furiously, I just haven't had a chance.

But when your daughter is this amazingly beautiful and sweet, it's a crime not to share that with the world. World, I apologize. Won't happen again.

Pudding Face

2008-02-09T22:47:00.000-08:00

Yum.

This Time Last Year

2008-01-25T06:23:00.001-08:00

Sabrina was modeling her fancy cold-weather hat and playing in the "cave" (the bush out front that hid the cable junction box) and we were celebrating a year of baby existence. What a little darling.

The Awesome Never Stops

2008-01-25T06:20:00.000-08:00

So many uses for bacon, AKA God's gift to humanity. This one I won't try, but it sounds lovely.

An Enormous Amount of Fun

2008-01-16T21:57:00.000-08:00

GodDAMN.

Site is objectionable for any number of reasons, but this video is amazing. Watch.

Easily the Deepest Sh*t Ever

2008-01-16T19:41:00.000-08:00

Words cannot express my feelings after watching this:

You can thank Skinny Bean in Denver for that.

Bad News

2008-01-04T19:46:00.000-08:00

What a bummer. George MacDonald Fraser was one of my favorite authors, I absolutely love his Flashman series and his accounts, fictionalized and otherwise, of military service in the Highland Light Infantry during and after WWII are absolutely amazing. The Flashman books are especially enjoyable; they chronicle the adventures of a (fictional) prominent Victorian soldier whose horniness and cowardice are only surpassed by his luck, leading him through amazing adventures that take him all over the world, where he meets every interesting character of the times, blunders into every interesting event of the times, and beds most of the interesting women of the times. They're extremely well written and, other than the presence of the main character, historically accurate, especially as concerns the language and local customs of the era. He also wrote the screenplay for the only Three Musketeers movie I've ever enjoyed, the 1973 version with Oliver Reed, Michael York, Faye Dunaway, Charlton Heston, Raquel Welch and Richard Chamberlain.

Just as enjoyable are his MacAuslan books, fictional retellings of his military service that are variously hilarious, poignant, heartwarming and fulfilling. I really loved Quartered Safe Out Here, his factual account of WWII service in Burma, but for some reason I keep rereading the fictional stuff and I like it more and more each time. I've reread a lot of his stuff, especially the Flashman books, but I'll probably reread the MacAuslan and Flashman stories for the rest of my life. They're just that good.

Godspeed, good sir. You'll be missed.

UPDATE: cool article by Christopher Hitchens here.

Artist at Work

2007-12-31T12:52:00.001-08:00

Isn't that just the finest Nemo/clownfish painting you've ever seen? This is Sabrina's first attempt at reproducing the lead character from Finding Nemo, and I think it's absolutely amazing. We've saved all of her painting, and they're all so good I'm going to take pictures of them and post them here. You'll be blown away, I guarontee . . .

Christmas Baby

2007-12-31T12:41:00.000-08:00

We were able to make Christmas happen for our little girl despite moving to our new house less than a week before, and I can't tell you how relieved we are to have pulled it all off. It definitely helps that she's still not entirely sure what Christmas is and when it's supposed to take place, but still, we're awesome.

I may be the last person to realize this, but the season really is all about kids. I've always loved Christmas, my favorite time of year and all that, but this one blows all of the previous ones away. There's just nothing like seeing your child light up with happiness for a whole day. Sabrina has never really done this before (last year doesn't count, from my point of view), but she has it all figured out. No hurry, worry or anything that detracts from the Christmas spirit, just presents, food, playing and baby happiness. We can't wait for next Christmas!

Like Figgy Pudding, Some Things Are Just Good for You

2007-12-26T13:08:00.000-08:00

Like this gem at Gerard's place, or this one at Sippican Cottage. Merry Christmas and love to all, and don't forget the way you feel right now until this time next year.

Nurturing Sabrina

2007-12-16T15:26:00.001-08:00

You may have noticed that in this picture Sabrina is nursing the Cookie Monster. We were talking about boobs (I wasn't wearing a shirt and she pointed to my chest, and the next thing you know we're talking about boobs) and I told her mine didn't work very well and that she couldn't nurse from them, whereupon she informed me that she could nurse herself, thank you very much. A moment later she admitted she was just kidding, but that she could nurse someone else. Cookie Monster was just the closest one. The picture was her idea.

Later that same day (this all takes place while Mommy is out shopping at Target), Sabrina pioneered the practice of eating grapes with her toes. She prefers it if someone else loads them, but in a pinch she can do it all herself. She's very proud of this new skill, and I can't wait for Mommy to see it.

Funny Guy

2007-12-15T05:58:00.000-08:00

I've never heard of Daniel Tosh before now, but he's funny as hell, dude man.

The Winner, and Still Champion, of All Blog Posts EVAH!

2007-12-12T15:21:00.000-08:00

Korla Pundit doesn't blog much, but when he does it can be pure genius. My permanent pick for best blog post ever is this 2004 masterpiece, and now he's followed it up with something equally magical. You go, Korla. All hail the king!

My Birthday is Coming Up, After All

2007-12-05T21:03:00.000-08:00

If there's something cooler than this, I'd like to know what it is.

Well That Was Interesting

2007-12-05T15:23:00.000-08:00

Mommy and Sabrina, having spent some of the day with a former neighbor and her daughter, picked me up at work so I could take them home and go back to the office. When we pulled into the driveway, I wondered aloud whose Dodge Durango was parked out front, and just then the person in the Durango's passenger seat honked its horn, and from the back of the house emerged a young hispanic fellow with shaved head, a bunch of tattoos and a small pair of scissors. I asked him "Can I help you?" to which he responded that he was looking for a friend. I asked "Did you find him behind my house?" and he said no, opening his hands to show me either a) that he had nothing of mine, or b) that he had a pair of scissors he was going to stab me with if I didn't let him pass. As I was unarmed and my wife and daughter were in the car, I let him go and got his license number, which I gave to the police when I called 911.

Every once in a while I miss being single. This is one of those times. I hate the fact that my family is exposed to this kind of thing, and as much as I appreciate how dumb it would have been to confront the guy or get physical with him, I really wanted to. I still do, I'd love to find him and sjambok him on the face, but that's not the kind of thing you can do when you have a family to think about. Which is a good thing, but I still sometimes miss being stupid and thoughtless, and doing the first dumb thing that occurs to me.

Birthday Baby

2007-12-05T15:14:00.001-08:00

Sweet Sabrina turned two last Sunday, and on Saturday we had a birthday party for her at Kiddie Acres, which has been in Austin for 30 years or so and resembles nothing so much as a Scooby Doo set. Maybe the wintery nature of the trees gave more of an abandoned-airground feel than actually exists there, but I swear I heard the owner use the phrase "meddling kids" at least once.

Sabrina, and all of the kids there, absolutely loved it. There were real ponies, a little train that ran around the outside of the place, and a bunch of old carnival rides, like this merry-go-round (Sabrina's favorite) and a mini ferris wheel that looked slightly rickety but was a crowd favorite. Sabrina was hard to pry off the horsey you see here, and probably would have stayed there all day if we hadn't kept bothering her with cake and presents. Great fun all around.

Genius

2007-11-16T22:27:00.000-08:00

This is a good idea.

What Does He Know, Anyway?

2007-11-14T11:47:00.000-08:00

Sure, he started the Weather Channel, but what the hell does this guy know about Global Warming? Well, this:

It is the greatest scam in history. I am amazed, appalled and highly offended by
it. Global Warming; It is a SCAM.

If only he'd just tell us how he feels, instead of dancing around the subject like that.

Rest in Peace

2007-11-03T17:11:00.000-07:00

I'll miss Robert Goulet, and not just because of this:

God that's good stuff. Best Will Ferrell moment ever, if you ask me. My favorite part is toward the end when he goes "Nature! Goulet." And this is what you get if you Google nature goulet. Which is silly.

Told You So a Thousand Times Over

2007-11-03T12:30:00.000-07:00

Skinny Bean in Denver, who not only is responsible for most of the interesting posts on Uncle Mikey these days but who lived a personal wet dream by attending the Green Bay/Denver Monday Night Football game in which his spirit guide Bert Frave (or something like that) saved the day with a 279-yard game-winning touchdown in overtime, points us to something that settles a longstanding argument I've been having with the few liberals who will still talk to me: the liberal media is biased toward liberalism and against conservatism. Shocker! Says who? Says Harvard:

Democrats are not only favored in the tone of the coverage. They get more
coverage period. This is particularly evident on morning news shows, which
"produced almost twice as many stories (51% to 27%) focused on Democratic
candidates than on Republicans."

The most flagrant bias, however, was found in newspapers. In reviewing
front-page coverage in 11 newspapers, the study found the tone positive in
nearly six times as many stories about Democrats as it was negative.

Breaking it down by candidates, the survey found that Sens. Barack
Obama and Hillary Clinton were the favorites. "Obama's front page coverage was
70% positive and 9% negative, and Clinton's was similarly 61% positive and 13%
negative."

In stories about Republicans, on the other hand, the tone was positive
in only a quarter of the stories; in four in 10 it was negative.

The study also discovered that newspaper stories "tended to be focused
more on political matters and less on issues and ideas than the media overall.
In all, 71% of newspaper stories concentrated on the 'game,' compared with 63%
overall."

More Halloween Fun

2007-10-28T22:10:00.000-07:00

This must be the fourth or fifth kiddie Halloween event Sabrina's been to already, and it's still only the 28th (in the picture, that is). She loves sweets and dressing up, so she's a natural. This is on a small stage that Sabrina gravitated to as soon as we came into the room, and pretty soon there were a bunch of other kids bouncing around onstage with her as I and some of the other parents provided rhythmic accompaniment.

Man is Sabrina a lot of fun, she just makes the whole room get up and dance wherever she goes. Yay Super Baby!

Bouncy Castles are Evil

2007-10-26T13:38:00.000-07:00

Sabrina survived a series of bouncy castle adventures two Fridays ago without incident, despite being inside one with four or five other children of similar age at least four different times. If you've never seen a group of two-year-olds in a bouncy castle, it's basically a NASCAR race without helmets. Wait long enough and someone's going to get hurt. Sabrina and the other tykes managed, how I still don't know, to avoid head-butting each other over a total of maybe 10 minutes, only to learn a painful lesson the next day.

On Saturday, Mommy took Sabrina to Texas Jumping Beans, a kiddie gymnasium with a number of different fun activities for kids, and one of them was a bouncy castle. At some point a little boy bounced up into her chin as she was coming down and she bit the heck out of her tongue. Mommy was very cool and collected as she picked Sabrina up, strapped her into the child seat and got me on the phone to find out where the nearest ER was. I, despite having seen a fair amount of gore, death and misery and feeling pretty much nothing about it, and being able to function well in such situations, lost it. Deirdre had to calm me down, which is pretty pathetic considering she was driving around with a screaming, bleeding baby at the time. I finally chilled enough to be helpful and started North to find them.

At the ER, I found that Sabrina was pretty calm and had bitten two large holes in her tongue. She cooperated nicely with the doc, who said no stitches were necessary and prescribed her Amoxicillin to ward off infection, and then warned us not to give her sour or salty foods. She immediately insisted on Cheetos and a lime popsicle, being the tough little thing she is. Yeah, they hurt, but not enough to keep her from eating them.

I had to ask the nurse what she thought about bouncy castles, and she said her kids don't get to do anything fun in the first place because she's an ER nurse, but that bouncy castles were particularly dangerous in her estimation. I asked what kind of injuries they cause, and she said "broken bones, concussions, terrible cuts, eye injuries, teeth knocked out by impact and ripped out by the safety netting" whereupon I told her enough, I was boycotting the bouncy castle too. Sabrina may have other plans, but the only way I'm letting her back in a bouncy castle in the nextg 18 months is if I get to go in with her and hip-check all the other kids away from her. I'm sure that will go over well with the other parents.

Oh Sweet Lord No

2007-10-19T08:06:00.000-07:00

I say no, but I'd eat the hell out of this. It would probably not result in a happy tummy, but the taste must be heavenly. Or disgusting, one of those two.

Thanks to Skinny Bean in Denver for the link.

Into Each Life a Little Poop Must Sashay

2007-10-17T18:08:00.000-07:00

It hurts me physically to see my daughter cry. Even worse is being the reason for the crying, which is extraordinarily unpleasant in every way. Makes you feel like a monster, which you are for being the reason a child cries. If you contribute in any way to a fall, like not moving something she could trip over from a path, you feel like Stalin.

Sabrina doesn't look terribly unhappy in this picture. I'm sure neither I nor my wife would have stood there and taken a picture while she was genuinely miserable, and she doesn't really look that pissy so it could be tiredness-based or manipulation for all I know. Yes, my daughter is a master manipulator already, and good for her. She's going to need that later.

I mean it's like having your skin peeled off, seeing and hearing your child in pain. In the running for worst thing ever.

The Unvarnished Truth

2007-10-13T10:14:00.000-07:00

If you didn't see Seinfeld accept the first annual Comedy Award, you missed one of the great speeches of all time. Watch and enjoy:

Sabrina and Aunt Clare

2007-10-02T19:13:00.001-07:00

My sister Clare's hypnotic stare has rendered Sabrina completely immobile and zombie-like. She's been doing that to all of us a lot lately, something to do with the yoga she's been studying I believe. So if you get trapped in an elevator with her, don't make eye contact or you may find yourself mailing her exotic candies and doing her ironing.

Sabrina had her first day of preschool today and loved it. About the third day we lived in the new house, we took Sabrina for a ride in the baby chariot you attach to the back of a bicycle, which she loved, and happened to run into a playgroup of 2005 babies that meets at the park a block away from where we live and run a little preschool at one of the many local churches twice a week. The parents themselves do the supervising, taking turns, and the idea is that you'd be able to leave your child there for a couple of hours twice a week and occasionally take care of a bunch of kids during that time, but I'm not convinced that D will want to do that as often as twice a week. That surprises me, considering how difficult it is to be a small child's primary caregiver 24/7 for years at a time, but my wife is exactly the mother I would wish for my daughter if I could invent her from scratch, and she's not handing our baby over to a group of strangers in a church until she knows for damn sure it's safe to do so. So she'll attend months of preschool with Sabrina before she decides, whereupon I have two options: to agree or to keep my mouth shut.

Am I right, ladies?

KO by Cuteness

2007-09-28T19:50:00.001-07:00

This just knocks me out, the look on her little face as she walks in the field at Hunt. She's got a lot of odd gaits these days, a lot of weird dances she gets into with and without music, and I try to keep up but it's no use. The kids these days, with the hair and the wild music.

Squinty McDarlingchild

2007-09-28T15:56:00.000-07:00

Oh my Lord our child is adorable. It's not just me, right? She really is officially the cutest thing ever born on this planet, right now. I can feel it with my newly enhanced Parental Quantum ESP.